Phil Long’s blog - Teletranone

The title may not fully represent the content of this post; that said it might. It’s all down to the interpretation; Your perspective, if you like. Let me not colour your outlook too much by informing you that I have mown the lawn this weekend.

I appreciate that for many your hearts are now palpitating in excitement, in *anticipation* of what feasts may follow such an astounding revelation and opening to a Blog post. I understand that you may be tempted to guide the whole world to read this post right now but, before you guide your mouse pointer to reach for the ‘Digg’ icon, I ask that you temper your desire and read through the entire post so you may appreciate my artistry in it’s entirety. I’m sure you’re all aware you should not judge a book by it’s cover.

That kinda shit stands here too.

I have taken delivery of my shiny-camera. It is shiny. And it is a camera - the Canon EOS 400D Digital SLR to be specific. Vital criteria met.

I’ve posted three albums on Facebook so far - a couple of BBQs and pictures from Zen’s twice-annual football tournament. I’m enjoying playing around with the manual settings and learning how to use it and get the most out of it in different situations. Though I am finding that the lense I have is not sufficient to getting the best out of some situations - for example a lot of the football photos came out blurred because getting a balance between lighting (without flash) exposure time and aperture size (cursed aperture science!) is extremely difficult with a kit lense. There’s a reason why the photographers at football matches have a bazooka attached to a tiny SLR. Had I a little more money now I’d be buying a telescopic lense for my Isle of Man trip as I’ve no doubt it’d get better pictures than I can achieve with the kit stuff. That said there is plenty I can do with the standard lense through use of manual settings. It’s pretty impressive what you can get in indoor lighting conditions with a stable surface and long exposure - and I am tending towards avoiding using the flash if at all possible to get more ‘natural’ images. One effect that “kinda” worked was an extended exposure on a tap with running water. It created a kind of ‘cloud’ effect to the water - but as it falls in a fairly controlled straight line it’s difficult to see. I’m interested in trying the same on a small water-fall-esque thing. The one at Robot House (work) may be interesting but, like a tap, is a little too vertical - maybe the scenery in the Isle of Man may lend itself more to that - if I can acquire a tripod. I have to say a lot of what I’m doing is ‘trial and error’ - but it’s fun to try and when it works it feels really quite rewarding.

Grand Theft Auto IV for the Playstation 3. Awesome. Really not much I can add to every other review. If you don’t like it then you probably have problems (or are over 32 years old, in which case ignore the following). Seek counseling. If that doesn’t work try getting a hose from the exhaust of your car to the cabin, start the engine and relax. Really, I can’t help you. I”m sorry. (*disclaimer: don’t kill yourself on my account, really I’m the last person you should take that kind of advise from - I don’t care whether you die or not. I might not like GTA:IV and just be saying I am to piss you off - hell, it could help the housing market).

Mario Kart for the Nintendo Wii. Actually fantastic - so much fun but for the reason *I* like games. I’m primarily a casual gamer - I rarely spend hours playing a game - and if I do I’ll typically leave it a week or so before playing again (ignoring Football Manager which I’m sure is hooked up to some Nygma device from a bad Batman film plot, thus prevent me assuming control of the time I spend playing it). GTA:IV I played for 5 hours on Saturday last week - but haven’t played it for more than a week now- I know it is awesome but I don’t want to *just* play that and do nothing else. In fairness weather is a deciding factor as well; it’s been sunny and I’d much rather sit outside than play games. In that and many other contexts, MarioKart can just be picked up and played whenever; either solo or online. It’s a quick-blast of fun on your own and a good addition to the Nintento party-piece armada. The control mechanism works really well (unless your Tufty “scha scha pad” Eddison) so it’s quickly accessible. For those who do lack motive control resulting in an inability to steer a wheel (I think the numeral dents in Tufty’s car shows perhaps the game is not at fault) you can use the Nun-chuck or a Game cube controller to steer. But you shouldn’t as so much of the fun is the tactile feeling of moving the controller to steer. This, of course, comes from somebody who used to try and dodge Tie-Fighters and obstacles in the Death Star run by ducking in X-Wing. It’s pretty much designed for my gaming style.

Wii Fit (Wii). I acquired this on the Sunday after release thanks to the populace of Rochdale being completely oblivious to the fact that Morrisons stocks such games and hardware. I had a similar experience when myself and colleagues acquired the Sony PSP on release day - despite it being almost impossible to acquire otherwise (that said the PSP was something I purchased on a whim - and, longer term, regretted- still got a decent price on e-bay though). It really does tire you out, but it’s a lot of fun too. Bizarrely it reports my BMI as on, or around, 22 - so ‘ideal’. Though it says I’m week. To be honest I can understand why - my legs are really quite scrawny when compared to my beer-reinforced upper-body. The only major issue is that I feel rather self-conscious using it with people around - Yoga with friends really DOES NOT work. Similarly, the hula-hoop thing is border-line obscene.

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